Real Life Family Photography, telling your story in the magic and the mess

Why a Family Film? : Part One : PNW Family Filmmaker

05.10.19

I constantly find myself asking, “how are we already here?” How the heck are all of my kids as big as they are right now? They are aging too damn fast, and my mind cannot keep up with it. When my oldest was first born I remember thinking kindergarten was lightyears away, and suddenly here he is, almost a second grader. These years are short, they are hard, they are fast, but they are THE MOST precious gift in life that we have been given. I know we wade through some really hard things with our kids, I know this to be very real. But, oh my God, are they wonderful? YES! I’m quickly seeing that these days are slipping away, and I just want to hold on to every bit that I have. But life gets busy and distracting, and I can’t always be present at every moment, and in reality my kids are going to grown up. But what if there was a way to hold on to some of those magical days we have with our kids? That’s where family films come in!

I have thousands of photographs of my kids. I love each one of them. But when I see my kids in film, in sound and motion, I am pulled back into that moment, that time of life. Hearing their laughter, their tiny voices, seeing their little legs run across the lawn, I get to keep that forever. I get to revisit it as many times as I want. I started shooting video two years ago and even just the two years that have passed, so much has changed. My toddler was a little baby, my boys were both in preschool, their limbs not as long and lean as they are now, their cheeks still chubby. It’s really hard to describe the feelings have when I watch those older videos. My heart aches when I see how much has changed. But now with family film, I don’t have say goodbye to all of it. It’s like someone pulled out the memories of my heart and made a visual representation. And family films can do the same for you, no matter what stage your family is in, you can capture this time of life to keep and revisit anytime you want.

What do you want to remember? What do you want to revisit?

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Stepping out of the Box into Family Films: PNW Family Filmmaker

05.03.19

I have this painted rock sitting on my desk within reach of my mouse and keyboard. In Tacoma, people paint and hide rocks around the city, called Tacoma Rocks (Ha, get it?!). This rock is painted bright blue with white clouds covered in glitter and under the clouds it says “DREAM.” I found this rock a little over two year ago, and I remember clearly the day I found it. I had just made my first family film of my kids with their cousins and I was hooked, obsessed. I knew this is what I wanted to do. I remember going on a run and being filled with so many emotions, dreaming big dreams, but then calling myself into question, doubting my capabilities. Then I looked down on the sidewalk under a lamppost, and there was this sparkly blue rock staring up at me, telling me to “dream.” I played with video on and off for a year, and then a year later signed up for Courtney’ Holmes’s course with The Filming Life Academy. Over the last year my films got better and better. When I am shooting I feel so joyful, so present in the story that is unfolding in front of me. When I edit and put the films together it feels like I’m writing a love story whether it is written directly to my children or a love story about another family. I feel alive.

So when I started sharing my films I assumed everyone else would feel just as alive as I did the first time I learned about family films. But that didn’t happen. I continued to shared and share some more. Overtime I have let myself get swallowed up in self doubt, questioning my capabilities, questioning my worth, questioning my path. So I climbed into my box of insecurity, hiding the thing that made my heart explode. Yea, I shared to social media and blogged my work, but inside I was hiding in a corner. Afraid to be too vulnerable, afraid to show people how dang special these family films are to me, afraid to share how damn much I want to make this the core of my business. Because, what if I didn’t succeed, what if I failed? What would people think? But then the great Brene Brown reminded me what it means to “dare greatly,” to step into the arena even if you get knocked down and kicked to the ground. Because this is where my heart lives and to ignore that would be something I would always regret.

So here I am, stepping (or maybe popping) out of the box with a direction. No longer cowering in the corner in fear of what others will think. I don’t want to be a family photographer who sometimes makes films. I want to be a family filmmaker who sometimes takes photos. So here I am.

https://vimeo.com/328344629

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The Beauty of a Weed: Tacoma & Seattle Family Photographer

04.26.19

I don’t know if it’s from my photography and filmmaking, or just the changes in my heart these last few years, but these lush spring days have me swooning over the masses of weeds growing in my yard, and the yards I pass by on my runs. I get that most people don’t like weeds, weeds are a nuisance, an eyesore, and a disruption of their perfectly pristine yards. But this year all I see are; the purples, the yellows, the blues and whites, so rich in color and texture, growing up from wild, untouched lawns. Yes, they are classified as a weeds, but blooming from those weeds, are tiny little flowers, eager to spread their color across our yards. Eager to be picked by chubby little hands and given with love to their mothers, to then be put in a bud vase in the kitchen windows, adored by the sweetness of our little ones. But they are met with contenders, such as lawnmowers, weedkiller, and those, eye gauging, weed plucker thingys. But there is something very wonderous about weeds. And it’s the fact that they just show up, uncontrolled and unpowered by human hands. Not lined up in rows of seed or bulbs to make something pleasing to the eye, and yet a bit unsettling in it’s perfection. The weeds are just there, and they show up when new life occurs all around us, in the renewing of spring. We bask at the sight of cherry blossoms and flowering trees, yet we scowl at the weeds in our lawns, because it doesn’t quite give the image of a perfect yard, a perfect house, a perfect life.

What are the weeds in you, that you have trampled down, plucked away and tried to kill off with toxins? Are there pieces of your heart that give you joy, give you purpose, and fill you with love, but because you’ve been taught they aren’t the image of perfection, they should be hidden away and removed for good? I think life was supposed to be filled with weeds, that the weeds growing in us are really who we are, they were already here. They just showed up when God made us. But this world we have grown accustomed to, has told us our lawns need to be one color of green and cut at the right level with no weeds that stand out in the perfect blades of grass. We live in this external world that make us feel the same about our bodies, how we look, what we do with our life, and what our homes look like to other people, even how our children look to others. We worry so much about what others think about and what we look like to someone else that we pull every last weed that may made us look different, because it brought judgement or disapproval from an other who did not know our heart. But those weeds that you have been made to feel ashamed of, maybe, just maybe they were meant to be there, they are a part of you that made you YOU, that was woven into your heart and soul as you grew in your mother’s womb. And to remove that part of you and take it away, even though it was that one thing that gave you life, gave you purpose, now empties your soul and teaches you to rely on external things to fill you up, rather than the fire that once existed inside of you.

I find my heart in search of the weeds that grew up into my heart as a baby, but were eventually stamped out for various reasons. My body and soul have been longing to let those weeds grow up once again and let the light shine on their beautiful colors and textures.

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The Garrison Family: Poulsbo Family Photographer

03.27.19

I have had the pleasure of previously photographing two families in this larger family, for newborn shoots. So it was fun to meet the whole gang and get EVERYONE in the picture. Yes, I shoot extended family portrait sessions. With the portraits you get the whole family, and then each smaller family. And of course I can’t resist candid shots, because candid (especially of two year olds with popsicles) is my love language. See the last few photos below.

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Aaron: Class of 2019: Tacoma Senior Photographer: Fort Steilacoom Park

03.25.19

Even in the dead of winter you can capture fabulous photos for you graduate, getting ready to finish up high school. Fort Steilacoom Park in Lakewood is a popular place for many different types of photo sessions. Aaron and his mom and I had fun getting their last minute senior photos.